Crisis on Infinite Parodyverses Part 2: The Gathering

Post By ag Wed Jun 21, 2006 at 11:55:27 am EDT	Subject Crisis on Infinite Parodyverses Part 2: The Gathering Originally All Right. Time to get serious about the PV. Crisis on Infinite Parodyverses Repost Thread	In Reply To ag Wed Jun 21, 2006 at 11:42:25 am EDT

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Two months before the Transworlds Challenge, the planet Thonggar.
This world has always prided itself on it’s strict military discipline. They’ve mastered a fine military, built a feared fleet of ships and utilized a gravity nullifying technology all their own.
For eons this race had been a war like people. Their chief opposition war the She-Yar Empire. That all changed a couple of years ago as Car-Tar Hool and his mate, Shy-Ra Thool- Hool, took over as it’s rulers. Since Car-Tar spent time on Earth as the hero Pigeonman he learned a thing or two about people, and kindness. He had built reforms into the society and had started to change a great deal. For the first time in recorded history they were at peace with the She-Yar. They also were friendly with Earth.
Unfortunately you cant change an eons old way of thinking over night. The Ancient Shadara is an important residing member of the Great Eyrie (the ruling body of Thonggar). He fought against Car-Tar Hool’s reforms for the entire time Hool has ruled the Empire.
There was even talk of civil war approaching as Shadara had amassed quite a following. This had rested on Car-Tar’s mind quite heavy.
He had other concerns as well. His only daughter, Princess Kyn’dra Hool, had turned two. It has always been the custom in Thonggarian society that two year old children get anointed and Kyn’dra was no different. It should be noted that at age one Thonggarian children are the equivalent of ten year olds on Earth. At age two the children are the equivalent of sixteen. At two they then age at a normal, slower human rate.
Car-Tar and Shy-Ra were so proud of their hatchling and expected only the best for her. They figured her future was bright and far reaching.
That was before the black hole opened up right next to the Thonggarian home world.
The system wide destruction was quick. Billions on the planet and billions more on her satellites died instantly. Others made it to the escape ships.
“FATHER! MOTHER! SAVE MEEEEEEEEEE!” Kyn’dra’s screams filled Car-Tar and Shy-Ra’s ears as their daughter disappeared into the strange glowing portal. Her mother tried to grab Kyn’dra’s arms but it was too late. The princess was gone and the portal disappeared.
“WHERE IS SHE? WHERE DID OUR DAUGHTER GO?” Screamed Shy-Ra as her husband held her.
Tears ran from both their eyes, “I don’t know my wife. I just don’t know. But wherever she went it’ll be far safer than here.”
The Great Eyrie was coming down around them when High Warrior Shazana Pel burst into the room, “Your highness! The last transport ship is leaving! You must get on it!”
Car-Tar Hool was back to business as usual. He didn’t even flinch, “What about the people? Is everyone out?”
“Well no. There are still families on level three and four.”
“Then I’m not leaving until they leave with me. Take the Queen and depart. I’ll find another way.”
Shy-Ra Thool- Hool grabbed his arm and said in no uncertain terms, “Where you go my husband I go.” Then she turned to Shazana Pel , their best most loyal guard, and said to her, “Go. Take the last transport and leave.”
“But your highness!”
“She gave you a command. See to it Shazana.”
The woman has always acted tough, but there was a funny look in her eyes as she replied, “Yes my lords.”
Shazana Pel had that same look as she watched the planet Thonggar implode into the black hole. The Great Eyrie and Royal Nest exploded and with it every soul still within. There were no other escaping ships.

Today, from the Moon Public Library where she now lives, Shazana Pel looked out across the stars and made a vow in her heart that they would be remembered.

Crisis on Infinite Parodyverses Part 2: The Gathering

The place; Earth RGA, a universe similar to our own Parodyverse, yet very different.
The time; Now.

This world has no Lair Legion. Instead, their main team is called the Righteous Guild of America. Some of the land masses are a bit different from the main Parodyverse and the stars align themselves differently.
This place has been destroyed before and recently been restored to it's pre-destruction glory. It seems that event will repeat it's self, yet again as the red skies, strange weather and cosmic anomalies have returned.
In the secret mountain cavern of Wil Magnuson, this World's Guardian, Wil stands at the cavern's entrance watching the oncoming crisis happen.
"Wil! It's getting worse by the minute! Maybe that intruder was right. Maybe we did die and came back and it's happening again?" Metala, one of Wil's robotic helpers, wondered.
"NO! I refuse to believe some interdimensional lunatic!" Wil said, then walked back to over to Metala.
"Now, I want you to contact Nite Avenger. Tell him my name, He knows me. Then ask him what the RGA are doing about this." Wil said, then pointed to the Red skies.
Before she can follow her master's orders a bright flash announces the arrival of a blue and red clad man. The cavern's automatic defenses systems kicked in and surrounded the man with a clear bubble. At least it had, until the defense systems shorted out, sending sparks everywhere.
"Aw Crap! I thought Herbert had fixed that!" Wil said.
Wil picked out one of his pistols and stepped towards the new visitor.
"Alright Bub I suggest you leave. Don't make me use this!" Wil said, now with the pistol aimed at the man's head.
"Wait!" Access pleaded. "You’re Wil Magnuson, right?"
"Yeah. What's it to you?"
"And your Alive?"
"Last time I checked."
"Listen. My name is Access."
"I don't care if your name is Gumdrop Sugarcane Fairy, ruler of the mystical realm known as Iowa. I suggest you leave." Wil said, now putting his finger on the trigger.
"I was sent here to retrieve an object of great power to save the Multiverse."
"Let me guess, you want the Infinity Pencil, too?"
Access, dumbfounded, nods.
"Well, you can't have it. I told that Prizecatcher guy that he couldn't have it and now I'm telling you. You can't have it."
"Wait, Please Mr. Magnuson! Listen to me! It's true I was sent for the pencil. But, my master will call you and explain."
"I except phone calls from other dimensions." Wil said.
"We thought your universe was destroyed."
"Why do people think were dead? Does it look like we died?"
"No. I am not with the other guy. He works for a very evil man."
"How do I know your not just lying to me."
"You don't. I guess need you to trust me." Access said, still afraid that he'll get his head blown off. He looked outside the cavern. He saw the sky. "Wil. May I call you Wil?"
"No."
"Ok. Mr. Magnuson. You see the red skies out there?"
"Yeah. So?"
"All that stuff was caused by a very evil man called the Cowled Criminal."
"He doesn't sound so evil."
"He is. Now my master, the Lurker, is trying to save universes. Isn't there some kind of machine you have that could verify this?"
"No. Not really. I do keep a lot of stuff here, mostly forbidden weapons. But, I couldn't tell you how they work. I just make sure that
people don't use them."
"Ok. You do believe that there are other dimensions?"
"Yes."
"You would like to keep on living?"
"Yes. Are you threatening me?"
"No. Just trying to prove a point. My Boss is trying to make it so a lot of people, much like yourself, can keep on living. So are you going to help me?"
"I guess so. I don't completely trust you, but I will help you."
"That's all I ask."
"Now, don't try anything funny." Wil said, as he lowered his gun.
"I won't"
"Alright, Mister...?" Wil paused for answer.
"Access!"
"Alright, Mister Access. You say my universe was destroyed before, yet we have no memory of it. How could this be?"
"That I don't have answer for as of yet. But your version of the Lair Legion could help me answer that."
"Who?"
"The Lair Legion." Access repeated. He saw that he was getting blank looks from Metala & Wil.
"Ok. Maybe your world's heroes can help me answer that." Access said, then he turned to walk back to where he came from.
"Where are you going?" Wil asked.
"I need to go tell my boss that your still here. I'll be back." Access said.
"Wil! Someone else is coming through the gate!" Metala warned just before some strange white tentacles wrapped around her and ripped her in two.
"METALA!" Wil screamed as the strange mass of constantly morphing white flesh dropped his assistant to the ground.
"It's called Warblk! It's one of the Cowled Criminal's agents! He’s the guy who is causing the weather and red skies. Watch out! He
can take any shape!"
After Access told Wil this, Warblk picked Wil up and threw him across the cave.
Access steps forward. "You'll not get the Pencil while I'm here, you monster!"
The creature can no longer speak but instead broadcasts it's thoughts into their brains. There are no words, just concepts. Access tries to make them out even as the tentacles wrap around him.
"You *UGGH* don't want the Pencil. You came...for me!"
Usually Access would use his powers at a moment like this and bring someone from the Multiverse here, but the creature is squeezing Access so hard, he's finding it hard to concentrate.
*FweeeeZAARRRK!* The whine of the laser in Wil's hands is the only give away as it rips a large hole through Warblk. Strange lighting sparks cover it's body, causing it to drop the wounded Access to the ground.
"I thought you couldn't use any of the weapons stored here?" Access said, between gasps of air.
"Normally, I can't. But, this seems like a good time to use one." Wil said as Warblk charged towards him.
Wil shot at Warblk a few more times, nothing happened. "That was the maximum setting! What is it going to take to kill you?" Wil shot again.
*FweeeeZAARRRK!*
*FweeeeZAARRRK!*
Blasts that would shatter a mountain, simply rock Warblk back. It's strange morphing face contorts in pain and anger as it looms over the Guardian. Before he could react, it wraps a tentacle around his leg, lifts him up and smashes him repeatedly on the hard ground. It finally lets him go as it tosses him into the wall.
Wil lies there, on top of the broken body of Metala. If he was anyone else he would've given up and passed out, but seeing her sparking shell sprawled there only fuels his anger.
"I'm sorry Metala." Wil whispers, not sure if she could even hear him.
Warblk painfully turned back to the dazed form of Access. Scott Asher, the hero called Access, hasn't been able to pull heroes from other universes since the Crisis began. All he can do is watch the monster crawl closer.
Wil's clothes are torn, his right arm is busted, there's a cut over his left eye that blood flows freely from but he still looks defiant. "Let's see how tough you are when you’re fried like an egg!"
In Wil's hands are 2 sparking wires from Metala, He touches them to Warblk and Wil fries the heck out of him. Warblk's scream could be heard for miles.
Then, it passed out. Access and Wil push the creature towards the gateway and it falls back through the portal.
Wil turns to Access and says "This isn't going to be easy, is it?"
Access looked at him with worry in his eyes.

Off Centre Park, in the center of Paradopolis. A strange hole in space and time seems to never close but instead is getting larger by the moment. Various people, pets and trees are getting sucked in.
The heroes of the city are on the scene and trying to keep the civilian body count down.
Lisa’s long brown hair flows with the sixty mile per hour winds as she grips on to a tree with her left arm. In her right arm is her whip. It’s the only thing keeping a woman jogger from falling into the portal. The woman’s companion screams for help as she tumbles towards the portal. She’s breathless as Captain Marbles swoops down to save her.
“Dancer, any luck?” he asks.
The Improbability Dancer is doing her best. Sweat beads on her forehead as she dances in place. She’s been trying to alter the probability of the portal closing for an hour but it’s not working.
“Yo is to be thinking cute Dancer be tired.” Yo replied for her/his friend. The only reason Dancer hasn’t become sucked into the portal is because Yo doesn’t think she should.
“We’re all tired Yo!” dull thud replied while clinging on a tree limb. “Cressie’s been using her powers to save people for an hour now and we both feel like we’re going to drop!”
Cressida, the telepathic tapeworm in dull thud’s stomach had turned a bench into a trench for park goers to hide in and now she’s focusing on postal worker Wally Dumpkiss’ mail carrier basket from carrier to barrier to protect him and the other people present.
“~I’ll manage Davie. We all will.~” she replied with exhaustion.
“Yo has idea! Yo will simply walk to uncute portal and it will be closing!” Yo starts to walk towards the portal.
“Yo! Don’t! It’s too dangerous! It’ll suck you in!” Dancer warned.
“Yo thinks it will be safe.” He/she turns to look back at her/his friends, “Do not to be worrying!”
Yo’s expression changes from innocent happiness to worry as the tree Lisa was holding on too pulls up from the ground a bit. This caused Lisa to loose her grip.
“Cute Lisa! Yo to be saving yooooooooooooooooooooooo” The distraction caused Yo to no longer think about resisting the vortex’s pull. Before the thought being could focus she/he was sucked into the vortex.
It closed shut and vanished.
“YOOOOOO!” Lisa called out.
Silence prevailed.

Further up, in orbit of Earth Parodyverse Prime where an impossible event happens. Two Amazing Guys burst onto orbit.
The one in the lead in Scott Brunsen. He commands Multiversal energy to create solid star field objects. He also can tap into a sort of cosmic sense that tells him when things are wrong in the Multiverse. Lately it’s gone wacko, causing him to have a constant migraine.
The other Amazing Guy hasn’t been seen in years. His name is Tom Irving. He can have up to five powers at a time. Any powers from any hero he can think of. For a very brief time Tom used to be the Parodyverse’s Amazing Guy, but due to the manipulation of cosmic powers Scott took his place. This meant that Tom was stranded in another universe. The two have shared a bond since the day Tom got his powers. At the moment Tom is using flight, speed and invulnerability.
The two are charging head long to confront Scott’s greatest nemesis, the man from yet another universe, Amoral Guy.
“Turn back to where ever you came from. You’re not welcome here.” Scott commanded.
“Why AG, such manners. And I thought Eggo taught you better.” Amoral Guy sends out an energy pulse as strong as two hundred stars. It knocks Scott back but Tom keeps coming.
“You won’t find me so easy copy cat!” Tom said as he grew twenty feet tall then used combined super strength to smack Amoral Guy. The villain’s force shield disrupted the hit easily.
“You must be that other Amazing Guy. You think you have what it takes to stop me? Think again!” Amoral Guy sends out energy blast after energy blast but Tom has shrunk to six inches and has sped at super speed around the blasts. In the blink of an eye Tom is coming at the foe from behind. He turns intangible and runs right through Amoral Guy’s force shield. He puts one intangible arm inside their villain and starts to solidify while using the other arm to create sub zero temperatures, freezing the villain.
Amoral Guy laughed even as his body started to freeze over, “Fool! You have all the powers available and you still think small!”
“I have what I need.” Tom replied as he suddenly switched the ice for electricity. Amoral Guy’s hair stood on end but that was the only sign of effect.
Scott had recovered by this time and was flying towards the battle. What he saw next froze his blood. A full blast of multicolored energy erupted from the two men. Scott could see Tom Irving’s body vaporize.
“NOOOOO!” Scott called out as he pulled on the interdimensional space between universes to create object after object to smash into Amoral Guy.
The villain just laughed. “You have no clue do you? My power has been increased a thousand fold while yours is at half if not less then half because of my master’s works. It’s over Brunsen. Let the REAL ‘AG’ win.”
Amoral Guy is sending a massive amount of energy at Scott. The Protector of the Parodyverse is sweating profusely as he gives everything he can to his cracking Multiversal Shield. “You killed him you @#$%! I WONT let you kill anymore!”
The Multiversal energy tendrils slinked through space on both Amoral Guy’s left and right sides. The villain didn’t even pay attention as they started to drill through his shield.
Scott pushed his broken shield closer, moving to intercept and confront his alternate universe adversary.
“You’re STILL holding on? Give me a break! This battle has gone on way to long. Goodnight hero!” Amoral Guy sends out a pulse blast so large it shines like a new star. Scott looks like his been vaporized as the blast completely shatters all his constructs and engulfs him completely.
Amoral Guy floats next to Scott’s ripped, beaten unconscious form. He has incased it in a colorful shield to keep Scott from succumbing to the vacuum of space. “Shame I have to turn you in to my boss. You could’ve been dead. Ah well. At least I killed one Amazing Guy today.”

It’s very lush and tropical in the hidden city of talking apes called Vesalia. With the exception of two different occasions, the apes have enjoyed peace for a very long time. The reason for their peace is the anonymity of the city. They have received very few visitors due to the secret of their existence.
Today they will receive one more.
“My Lord, the populace are getting worried! The strange skies, the bad weather, they cannot take much more of it!” General Ukko stressed to King Lui in the central palace.
“Tell them to remain calm. Until we know more we can’t truly act. Besides, there are many heroes on this world. They are doing their best to resolve the problem.”
“KING LUI! KING LUI! Something is approaching Vesalia at great speed!” Dr. Zanus exclaimed as he ran into the central palace’s Great Hall.
“What is it?”
Just then a bright flash of light appears in front of the king. The woman known as Humdinger appears with her right arm stretched out. “King Lui of Vesalia my master desires your assistance!”
“What is this? Who are you?” the king asked. His ape troops led by General Ukko charged forward but when they reached their king he and Humdinger had vanished.

1201 AD, the middle ages
A strange portal opened up. Yo, dressed in her/his black Zorro outfit, tumbled out.
“Where is Yo to be being?”
The sounds of hoof beats filled the air as several knights arrived.
Sir Jarvikins, the leader, called down to the confused thought being, “Ho newcomer! What does thou doist in the noble forest of our noble land?”
“Cute Jarvis? You is being alive?” Yo started to notice the other knights present.
Lady Lisette Waltshire sat properly on her white horse, Helm Man was next to her with the sun glinting off his large helmet, Star Sword, Sir Shifty, Lady Cherlyeena and the BawdyBardJesterJouster! all rode up on their horses to see who the head knight was speaking to. The young page known as spoffy and the artificial knight known as Fake man walked beside them.
“Is cute Lisa, Starseed, Cheryl, CrazySurgarFreakBoy!, spiffy and Visionary!”
There was an unusual sound for this era as two knights actually were flying in the air. Soon those knights, KFC-149 and Do-do bird landed on the soft ground.
“And cute NTU-150 and Darkhwk! You all look like Yo’s friends the cute Lair Legion. But you are to be very different.”
“Hark! Who is this fine lady?” the Forester asked as he swung from a tree to land beside his team mates.
“You ist mistaken Bastion. This art be a man, not a woman.” Helm Man corrected him.
“Uncute Trickshot too?”
Yo’s attention was drawn once more to the sky as the familiar flapping of wings could be heard. “Cute Finny?”
She/he knew right away it wasn’t. The dragon landing with the green trussed woman on it’s back was not a Makluan like Yo’s friend Fin Fang Foom but instead it was a real mystical dragon.
“His name is Puff, strange one, and I am called Sersin. He is my companion.” The woman explained as she climbed to the ground.
“Yo know you! You be cute Sersi! Yo being glad to be seeing you again cute Sersi! How is Vegas?”
“You speaketh most strange! How is it you know my Greek name?” she replied.
Sir Jarvikins climbed of his white steed, “Yea, how do you recognize us? What are those strange names you called us? And where did thou come from?”
The Darkened Knight lurked in the trees, listening carefully to the answers.
“Yo doesn’t know how Yo came to be here. Yo was with cute friends saving cute people from uncute opening when Yo was sucked through. Then Yo wound up here.”
“I might be of assistance.” Holland V said as he stepped out of the trees. “This be a hero from a far away land. He/she has done many noble deeds and has come here to join the Lair Knights for a time.”
“Yo is? Yo thanks you cute Hollywood V for the invitation but Yo thinks Yo should return to her/his friends. Good bye.”
Nothing happened. Yo is a thought being from Yo-Planet and as such she/he can make anything happen as long as Yo believes it will. But for some unexplained reason it’s not working this time.
“Yo SAID Yo thinks Yo should go home.”
Still nothing.
“Gentle Yo-Being, mayhap you ARE home now.” HV replied.
“If you are indeed a true champion as Holland V explained then we could use your help.” Lady Lisette Waltshire explained. “Our companion Donar has left us for his far away land. Mayhap you could replace him?”
“You know cute Donar too? And you be wanting Yo to help you?” she/he looked at their faces. If Yo was to be trapped in another time at least it would be one where versions of her/his friends lived. “Alright. Yo accepts. But Yo will try a different name here. You will be being Yoodle-he-hoo. It is cute silly name for cute silly time.”

The Hooded Mage watched these events from his mirror with interest. His Sea Monkey creature called Banjeremiahhhh growled in the background while his demon Eatagain smiled.
Eatagain said with a grin, “A being of thought comes to call, can the end of the world be far at all?”
The Hooded Mage said nothing.

The beautiful island of Oahu, Hawaii, where chaos has reigned for weeks. Earlier today a freak energy cyclone had tried to destroy the big island called Hawaii. Mr. Epitome and the Manga Shoggoth with the help of local hero Kala Huni stopped it.
Not an hour after they left a giant sea serpent attacked the shoreline town called Makaha. Hatman, Goldeneyed and Kala Huni just finished defeating the monster and were greeted by several relieved citizens on the beach.
“Goldeneyed! Thank you! I rooted for you during the Transworlds Challenge!”
“Hatman! You’re the man, bra!”
“Hatman! Come surfing with us dude!”
“Goldeneyed! Can you indorse my pineapple company?”
“Hatman! Want to come with me under the docks?”
“Whoa! Wait! We’ve got to head back to the mainland.” Hatman tried but several beautiful hula girls surrounded him and Goldeneyed and placed leas over their heads. One girl kissed Hatman on the cheek. Another grabbed his butt.
“Hey! Come on people. We’re glad we helped but we must be going.”
“Excuse me laddie but where are the ships?”
Both heroes looked at the strangely dressed man who approached them.
“Is this another member of the Legion?” local hero Kala Huni wondered.
“I don’t know him. Do you Jay?” Goldeneyed asked.
“No. Who are you sir?” Jay Boaz aka Hatman asked the plaid wearing Scotsman.
“My name is the Plaid Bee. I’ve been stationed at Pearl Harbor for just a short time. In fact that’s where I was just a second ago. How did I wind up on the beach?”
The Legionaries looked at Kala Huni, “A friend of yours?”
He just shrugged and replied, “I’ve never heard of him.”
“An another thing lads. Why is the clothing so different? Everyone’s dressed so funny.”
Catching on Jay asked, “What year is it Mr. Bee?”
“That’s Plaid Bee and it’s a silly question. It’s ’41 of course.”
Before Jay and Bry could allow themselves to be thunderstruck a woman yelled, “Hey! What are those planes doing?”
Several vantage Japanese Zeros from 1941 zoomed down towards the beach. When they opened fire the people screamed and scattered.
“Ach! The Japs are attacking!” the Plaid Bee called out just before he vanished into thin air.
Goldeneyed focused and with a flash of his yellow eyes one of the Zeros teleported into the ocean. Hatman donned his Seattle Super Sonics cap and took to the air. Kala Huni used his volcanic powers to send lava to the ground, propelling him up towards the planes.
Once there Jay switched hats to his Pittsburg Steelers cap and smashed into the back of a cockpit, punching out the frightened Axis soldier. Kala Huni clogged two plans propellers with hot magma.
Jay switched to his Mexican Jumping Bean cap and hopped over to another plane. While leaping he glanced back to the shore. “Where’s Bry?”
Goldeneyed was unconscious on the top of Diamondhead Mountain. The villain known as Spacewarped stood over him.
“Bet you didn’t expect to be teleported out, did you?”
The villain’s appearance was that of a starry silhouette. He just threw his head back and laughed. “You know I could kill you right now but I wont. The ‘master’ commanded me not too. Just you wait though. When he’s done with you it’ll be my turn!”

The Lurker’s Hexagonal Ship, where he continues to watch various screens at the same time.
Access teleports to his side. “Master Lurker, you’ll never believe what I found out! Earth Ranchburger is back!”
“My machines are having difficulty viewing the many Earths and times, are you certain?”
“Yes. I just came from Wil Magnusson’s home. He’s guarding the Pencil, waiting on word from you about the Crisis. He doesn’t remember their universe getting destroyed.”
“Strange. No world has ever returned from the Plaid Wall before.”
“I don’t think it did return Master Lurker. He acted like the destruction never happened. Like the whole universe was reset or something.”
“Wait Scott. What did you just say?”
“It was like the universe was reset back to the way it was be…”
“Of course! Just like before! When Earth Ranchburger was destroyed! Leave me for a minute. I need to ponder the implications of this!”

The Lair Mansion, home of the Lair Legion.
“She’s gone Mumph. There was nothing we could do.” Lisa explained. She and Captain Marbles stood in Sir Mumphrey Wilton’s office. They had just returned from Off Centre Park. Sir Mumphrey could swear he saw tears in Lisa’s eyes.
“Buck up and all that, what. The gels been through worse then this. I’m sure she’ll find her way back home. For now there’s still a world that needs saving. I’ve sent Dancer to Virginia to help out Kid Produce and Horizon stop out of time Civil War soldiers from messing things up. I need you two to tarry off to the Carrington business district. Trickshot and that Alcheman chap are in a spot of trouble there. And Captain, thank you for helping us out.”
“It’s no problem sir. Maybe I’m supposed to be dead in this future of yours but that doesn’t mean I can’t do my part.”
Right after they left a vortex opened up in Mumph’s office.
“Are we there yet?” Ham-Boy asked for the seventh time.
“For the last time… oh! I guess we are!” Visionary replied. Glory bounded around the room saying in her unique way, “It’s good to be home from Ausgard!” No one understood her gestures or barks to mean that however.
Fashion Accessory stretched her arms and said with relief, “We’re home!”
“About time! I was getting Interdimensional jet lag!” Ham-Boy stretched his arms as well.
“I need to burn something quick or I’ll go nuts.” Kerry Shepherdson quipped as she looked around the room for something flammable. “I think we were trapped in that portal for days.” Visionary replied then he saw Sir Mumphrey. “Mumph! Ausgard has crazy weather too! And Donar’s prophet guy told us the end of the world is coming.”
“And dweebo thought we should die here with you guys instead of there.” Kerry replied.
“Now Miss Shepardson, you must understand Visionary did what he thought was right. Best keep the family together during a crisis, what?”
“Aye. Yon Fake One did think of us, but I does still worry that my noble parents and fair homeland will master these storms.” Harlagaz replied with worry.
Visionary didn’t mention the main reason he wanted to head home was to check to see if he did indeed turn the toaster off like he thought.
The emerald phantom image of Hallie, the resident I.A., appeared before all of them. She looked relieved to see Visionary back safe and sound but she didn’t say a word about her fears. “Sir Mumphrey, Visionary, we have trouble!”
“Maybe we should’ve stayed in Ausgard?” Vish wondered.
“What is it Hallie?” Mumph asked.
“Goldeneyed and Amazing Guy have vanished just like Yo. I can’t patch into their comunicards any longer”
“Yo is missing?” Vish checked.

1869, the Old West town called Last Ditch.
One thing about the early western US? It's a vast, open territory with little industrial development. She/he can hear birds chirping, horses neighing, and the other sounds of early morning Western life.
Yo has been up since early this morning. Having changed her/his appearance back to the natural Zorro outfit and sword, Yo looks outside the window of their second story motel room. Her friend and time traveling companion Justin Tyme is still asleep. He's been on the go since his stint in '42.
Not wanting to disturb him, Yo slipped out to explore Last Ditch and it's people. She/he loves people. They come in so many different shapes and forms.
As she/he walks down the dusty path in front of the stores, Yo can’t help but think of her/his friends.
Things were going pretty good lately. The battles with Lord Resolution, Balefire and Count Armageddon were long over, other adventures had come and went. Finny and DK were back from space finally. spiffy was the new president of Badrapoor. Yo was happily acting as the deputy leader of the Lair Legion. The heroes survived the Transworlds Challenge and now the public thought them heroes once more.
Then things got weird.
The skies had turned red for sometime but other things began to happen that made that phenomenon look normal. The weather got really weird. Soon the LL and the other heroes were constantly keeping busy stopping disasters.
Then the strangest thing. People and places from other times started popping in and out. It was like time was getting mixed up bit by bit.
Finally, Yo and other heroes went to check out a strange glowing hole in Off Center Park. Before anyone could help her/him, Yo found her/himself stuck in the Lair Knights time. She/he changed her/his name to Yoodle-he-hoo and joined the Lair Knights. When Justin arrived Yo remembered him from his brief stint in Yo's time.
Yo knew then that she/he would be able to finally get home.
So here she/he is. The old West, during the time of all those movies the guys watch.
Yo is so caught up in her/his thoughts that she/he almost misses the little blond girl in pigtails looking up at her/him.
"Excuse me Miss, but can you help me find my bunny? Little buttons is missing. I was playing with her when she ran into that ally over there." The little girl asked as she sobbed.
"Of course! Yo will help you little cute girl!" Yo happily responded while entering the ally between buildings.
A strange glow was coming from the back of the ally.
"That's where my bunny hopped. She just disappeared in that hole!"
Yo approached the glowing hole, looking for any sign of the rabbit, "Yo doesn't see any cute bunnies. Is cute girl to be sure her cute bunnies came here?"
The sweet girl's voice changed even as her little body transformed into a strange large eyed creature of a man, "Look closer!" He kicked Yo into the portal, "You trusting fool-ool-ool!"
The Spaced Fandom jumped through the portal after his captive thought being. Soon the portal was gone and with it Yo.

Next up, Lisa goes one way and Captain Marbles goes the other. The death of Alcheman. Trouble for spiffy, Troia 215, CrazySurgarFreakBoy, Azure Arak and Swift. Staring De Brown Streak, Glory, Ham-Boy, Aaaron of Atlantis, Justin Tyme, Fashion Fairy, the Globetrotting Gangbusters, the All Star Winner’s Squadron, Chronic, Captain Courageous, Shadow Dancer of the Lair Legion of Super Heroes, Trickshot, Dikki of the Guild of the Galactic and many more!

Hungry Like A Footnotes

POISONING PIGEONS IN THE PARK NOTES:
Yes, it is true. The second Pigeonman and his mate, Pigeongirl, are dead. When I first started writing stories for the board I created the lost Thonggarian policeman. Since then we’ve met his wife, daughter and entire Thonggarian race. It should be noted here that until this story there have been several Pigeon heroes. Here’s a quick run down;

Pigeonman I (Carl Hallow, formally Carter Hallmark): Golden Age hero. Retired. Former member of the Lair Society of Justice and JBH. Currently active helping with Crisis disasters. Not affiliated with Thonggar.

Pigeonwoman I / Pigeongirl I (Shelly Hallow, formally Sherry Hallmark): Golden Age hero. Retired. Former member of the Lair Society of Justice and JBH. Currently active helping with Crisis disasters. Not affiliated with Thonggar.

Pigeonman II (Car-Tar Hool): Modern Hero. Ruler of Thonggar. Dead. Former member of the JBH.

Pigeongirl II (Shy-Ra Thool- Hool): Queen and mate to Pigeonman II. Dead.
Kyn’dra Hool: Their daughter. Alive but lost in time/ space vortex.

Pigeon (Julia Thompson, Falcon’s girlfriend): Modern Hero. Above-average human endurance, strength, agility, dexterity, control of marble surfaces. Currently active helping with Crisis disasters. Not affiliated with Thonggar.

Shazana Pel : Thonggarian policewoman and warrior rescued by the Lair Legion during the Transworlds Challenge. Shamed because of this and now resides on Earth’s moon as a guest of the Librarian.

It should be noted here that the planet Thonggar is completely destroyed. The once great Thonggarian Empire has been reduced to a few broken down refugee ships trying to find a home. The Ancient Shadara is the only surviving member of the prior leadership (except the missing Princess Kyn’dra Hool). He leads the Thonggarian refugees in hopes of bringing his people back to the glorious war like days of old. He’s not nice.

RANCHBURGER SPECIAL WITH A SIDE ORDER OF PENCIL:
Earth RGA, otherwise known as Earth Ranchburger. This is the Earth where the Librarian came from (before the retcon that made it so that he was always from Parodyverse Main). This Earth has many defenders including their most famous, the Righteous Guild of America. This is also the Earth that was recently destroyed by the wave of Anti-Story sweeping through the Multiverse. All that was left was the Infinity Pencil floating in the void.
Yet this story takes place after that. How can it be back? We’re still waiting to find out.
A big thank you to L! for co writing the scene with Wil, Metala and Access.

CAPTAIN WHO NOTE:
Captain Marbles was the Protector of the Universe before the current heroic age. He was killed by Dark Thugos. For some strange reason he’s been pulled out of time and is in the present era helping out the Lair Legion.

WHAT’S UP WITH YO NOTE:
Basically Andrew (the poster known as Messenger) wrote a story about the Lair Knights. He created them. He also created Yoodle-he-hoo (the Knight version of Yo).
When it came time for me to create historical characters to show in Tyme Travels I posted a question about earlier versions of heroes. Pillar told me that her character, Yo, was the one and only and didn’t have any historical relatives.
That didn’t explain where Yoodle-he-hoo came from, if not a Yo-Being. So I wrote a Tyme Travels story that showed Yo trapped in the Knights time, using the name “Yoodle-he-hoo”. This issue of Crisis shows how Yo got stuck there to begin with.
When Justin showed up in the Lair Knights time Yo left for the future with him. This link takes you to that Tyme Travels issue, #7

The next stop for Justin was the Old West. The scene in this story where Yo gets captured is from that issue.
Tyme Travels #8 (written in 2002) is a Crisis tie in and really should be read after this issue of Crisis.

This story is written and copyrighted (C) 2004 by Scott Bryan (also known as AG), and may not be
reprinted without permission. Annabelle, Roland, Anthony Foresight, Amazing Guy, Justin Time, Jack Rabbit, Jackie Rabbit, Desert Rose, Eli the Elemental, Kid Produce, Scott Brunsen, Tom Irving, the JBH and the Amazing Bunch all are properties of Scott Bryan and AG.

a.g.
Amazing Guy

Scott’s Site! Featuring Caption the Pic (where action figures talk!) and Amazing Tales on the Web (stories and micros of the Parodyverse!).

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